Remembering Our Captain Planet~

-This entry has FINALLY been materialized & dedicated to our most beloved conductor & his wind symphony after this most beautiful 2.5 years' journey of music-making-
In remembrance of:

how he told us funny jokes (could be factual though)~

- Richard Strauss said this: Never look at the brasses encouragingly…it does a lot of damage~ [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- they always say how do you make two oboes play in tune? kill one~ [Soaring over the Ridges]
- & everybody hears the trumpets because they’re at the top… … …because you’ve always got to make trumpets feel better~ [Poema Alpestra]
- I think you have to make me very fat…then I can conduct this very nicely~ [Finlandia]
- everytime something changes it feels better…it’s psychological! [Planet Earth]
- now you can hear more mistakes when last time I was the only one suffering~ [Planet Earth]
- it’s also in their character… … …have you ever wondered why trumpets (trumpeters) and trombones (trombonists) play trumpets and trombones? because they are showy people~ [Extreme Makeover]


how he gave us advice in humorous manners~

- even if you miss 20 bars…be professional about it~ [Planet Earth]
- and the rest of you with nothing to do…by sitting down…you’re part of the music…& I tell you, this is one of the hardest things to do – to be a statue~ & the moral of the story – stillness is power~ [Planet Earth]
- counting is an important part of this piece…don’t get lost…this piece is about not getting lost~[Planet Earth]
- you hit the B flat on concert day it’s worth one million dollars~ [Planet Earth]
- play like you’re happy being 40 years old~
- patience is the hallmark of all ensembles~ we have to be patient~ [Pictures At An Exhibition]
- rests are the hardest things to play in the universe~
- practice faking it until it sounds convincing~ [Extreme Makeover]
- listen~ studies have shown that you can’t listen while you talk~
- you can miss notes…but you can’t mess things up~ [Extreme Makeover]
- never mind…repent…practice…and get on~ [Extreme Makeover]


how he re-created our identities~

- we're sound engineers~ [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- we’ve gotta be a three thousand dollar home theatre entertainment system~ [King Cotton]


how he helped us better convey musicality to others~

- you must paint the picture in the audience’s minds~ [Cartoon]
- 400 years dynamic contrast…it still works today~ [Cartoon]
- it’s not about how fast…how slow…how loud…how soft…it’s about how interesting~ [Finlandia]
- projection is sending a musical thought to the end of the hall~ [Planet Earth]
- you don’t have to play louder…but think fiercer~ [Planet Earth]
- the excitement doesn’t have to come from tempo…it can come from attitude~ [Extreme Makeover]


how he expressed meaningful musical thoughts~

- if you are stuck at the notes you can never get up to the artistry~ [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- the strength of the ensemble is as strong as its weakest player~ [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- intonation is a matter of conscience~ [Poema Alpestra]
- sound defies silence like life defies death~ [Poema Alpestra]
- music is like life…it’s always changing~ [Planet Earth]
- music is between the notes…phrase it~ [Children's March]
- the key to artistic freedom is lots of discipline~ [Children’s March]
- don’t practice~ perform~ [Extreme Makeover]


how he introduced musical concepts to us~

- this is matrical displacement! [Planet Earth]
- even though it’s one line…there’re two voices~ this is called compound melody~ [Children’s March]
- a melodic metamorphosis~ [Extreme Makeover]


how he taught us ways for better musical expression~

- every time the phrase starts…give definition to the first note~ this is articulation discipline~ [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- the first note is more an impulse of will~ [Folk Song Suite]
- to show tenuto…create the illusion of length~ [Folk Song Suite]
- when you crescendo…you really do more~ when you diminuendo…you really do less~ [Folk Song Suite]
- look less on the music…focus more on the togetherness~ [Cartoon]
- a good army practice hygiene…you need to release together~ good release means start silence together~ [Planet Earth]
- keep the sound round…we need to sound rich…but not forced~ [Planet Earth]


how he brought emotions into the music~

- this is the promise of reaching…play this with a sense of hope~ [Poema Alpestra]
- let yourself be vulnerable…play from the inside of your heart~ [Finlandia]
- everyone must be still…only then can your inner voice speak~ there’s too much noise on the outside~ ["GR" Selection]


how he incorporated ideas into music-making~

- (to the flutes) together like a horse whip! [Silver Screen]
- horns! think horizontally! [Silver Screen]
- music must always go somewhere…make sure your notes go somewhere~ [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- let all the colours match! & play microscopically clean! [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- we need to play with an architecture of dynamics~ [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- clarinets…endeavor to play together with the woodblock~ woodblock…endeavor to play together with the clarinets~ [Cartoon]
- every phrase needs to go somewhere~ but where? [Finlandia]
- for every piece the band needs to sound different~ [Finlandia]
- we need a sense of line; musical line~ as if every note is precious~ [Finlandia]
- If you keep hanging onto something…it means something~ [Poema Alpestra]
- this is a divine state…you’re at the top of the mountain~ [Poema Alpestra]
- you reach the mountain peak! [Poema Alpestra]
- before you play you must have the concept in your head~ [Cartoon]
- Jacob said…you have two instruments~ one in your hand…and one in your head~ [Cartoon]
- if this melody is chicken…you’ve got to cook it in different ways~ [Children’s March]
- we have overall sound but we bring out different colors…that’s what makes it more interesting~ [Crescent & Stars]
- (to euphos) you need to play…you need to probe in depth…you need to find your centre~ [Finlandia]
- for every pitch you must think before you play~ [Planet Earth]
- you just think about the music and the notes will come! [Planet Earth]
- remove the edge from the tone as far as possible~ [Planet Earth]
- play as if there’s a bubble on top of you~ don’t you burst the bubble~ [King Cotton]
- you have to play like a soloist…with the awareness of what’s going on around you~ [King Cotton]
- if you only run through…you don’t know the details~ if you only do the details…you don’t know what house you’re building~ [Extreme Makeover]
- imagine you’re an apple~ you know where the seeds are? play from there~ [Extreme Makeover]


how he gave us useful reminders during rehearsals~

- don't rush the staccatos…it's a disease! [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- everytime you repeat it…it must be for a purpose…it must get better~ [Merry Wives of Windsor]
- don't get too loud too quickly or the architecture of music will be lost~
- it’s always tempting to practice the parts you can play~ [Silver Screen]
- don’t accept anything that is less than good~ [Poema Alpestra]
- no matter how tired you are…mind over body~ [Poema Alpestra]
- if you think of the notes in between…it will become much cleaner~ [Folk Song Suite]
- when you have the melody…don’t fight for supremacy~ [Folk Song Suite]
- don’t look at the score…I’ll cue you~ you know we like to seek comfort in the score? [Bahn Frei]
- the moral of the story is if Ashkenazi practices with a metronome…so should we~ [Planet Earth]
- make sure you don’t breathe when your neighbor is breathing…that’s all you need to do~ [Planet Earth]
- trumpets and trombones…never get into that nuclear bomb effect~


how he always made nice comments about composers~

- the note G in a minor scale is a note of sorrow~ 40 years of western music have proven that this note is the note of sorrow and indeed Cesarini has used it in the beginning~ [Poema Alpestra]
- this piece really need a lot of microscopic work here… … …intelligent composer~ [Cartoon]
- (about Grainger) have you googled him? very handsome! [Children’s March]
- Johan de Meij just writes very well~ it’s the way he writes…he makes it sound impressive~ [Extreme Makeover]


how he amused us while commenting on our playing~

- (to flute solo) you need to be seductive…this movement has many sounds~ [Cartoon]
- (to saxophones) you were all together but on the wrong beat~ amazing…it’s team spirit~ that was good unity~ [Cartoon]
- trumpets…the color is right…keep it up…just that the rhythm is wrong~ [Planet Earth]
- eupho I bless you on the high notes~ [Children’s March]
- clarinets you have no problem with the rhythm…you have every problem with the notes [Extreme Makeover]


how he liked to summarize his advices into point forms~

[Intempo 2007]

3 things…we must be:

1) anti-bad tone
2) anti-bad tuning
3) anti-bad articulation

----------------------------------------------

[InTempo 2008]

Remember P-E-S:

Projection
Excellence (sense of excellence)
Spirit

4 things to take note of:

1) Dynamics
2) Clarity
3) Style
4) Tempo

3 secrets:

1st secret: air
2nd secret: less mouthpiece pressure
3rd secret: drop your tongue (resonate inside your head)

The 5 commandments / the 5 ‘P’s:

Thou shall be Present
Thou shall be Puntual
Thou shall have a Pencil during rehearsals
Thou shall Practise before rehearsals…not during rehearsals
Thou shall be Passionate about music

The 3 types of release:

1) a clean release [the tone shape is a vertical line]
2) a tapered release [the tone shape is rounded]
3) an intense release [swell]

----------------------------------------------

[Da Capo 2008]

Every note has got to have:

1) a clear attack
2) a clear sustain
3) a clear release

3 things to remember during the concert:

1) watch
2) respond
3) play with a beautiful sound (don’t blast!)


how he provided us with encouragement~

- (about glaring/blaming) I’ll never do that if my musicians come in wrongly…because I know you don’t mean it~ [Planet Earth]
- this orchestra has an increasing desire to do well~
- it’s encouraging by this mere fact that you want to do well~


how he gave us reassurance before our concerts~

- play in good spirit!
- nobody wants to make mistakes~
- live performances are meant to have mistakes~
- professionals make mistakes…professionals miss notes…it’s part and parcel of a musician’s life~ - don’t get so performance-oriented until you want to kill your friends~
- I think the process is much more important~
- I think Intempo will be a wonderful blast…but please don’t blast k?


& how he showered us with his sincere compliments~

- I do think you are a good band and I sincerely believe it~
- have pride of a fine orchestra…because you are one~



Quote of the Day: A smile is an inexpensive way to add value to your words. -Mr. Leonard Tan

Featuring Females~

From yokes' [happy valentine's day!] entry on 14/02/2008 (Thursday):

Why God Created Woman from the Man's Rib~

It’s amazing how God made man, and so beautiful how he made woman! Why did God create Woman from Man’s rib, when He could have simply created her from dust, as He did Man? This is a story that puts a beautiful touch on the reasoning:

“When I created the heavens and the earth, I spoke them into being. When I created man, I formed him from the dust of the Earth and breathed life into his nostrils. But you, woman, I fashioned after I breathed the breath of life into man because your nostrils are too delicate. I allowed a deep sleep to come over him so I could patiently and perfectly fashion you. Man was put to sleep so that he could not interfere with the creativity. From one bone I fashioned you. I chose the bone that protects man’s life. I chose the rib, which protects his heart and lungs and supports him, as you are meant to do.”

“Around this one bone I shaped you. I modeled you. I created you perfectly and beautifully. Your characteristics are as the rib, strong yet delicate and fragile. You provide protection for the most delicate organ in man, his heart. His heart is the center of his being; his lungs hold the breath of life. The rib cage will allow itself to be broken before it will allow damage to the heart. Support man as the rib cage supports the body.”

“You were not taken from his feet, to be under him, nor were you taken from his head, to be above him. You were taken from his side, to stand beside him and be held close to his side. You are my perfect angel. You are my beautiful little girl. You have grown to be a splendid woman of excellence, and my eyes fill when I see the virtue in your heart. Your eyes: don’t change them. Your lips: how lovely when they part in prayer. Your nose so perfect in form, your hands so gentle to touch. I’ve caressed your face in your deepest sleep; I’ve held your heart close to mine. Of all that lives and breathes, you are the most like me.”

“Adam walked with me in the cool of the day and yet he was lonely. He could not see me or touch me. He could only feel me. So everything I wanted Adam to share and experience with me, I fashioned in you: my holiness, my strength, my purity, my love, my protection and support. You are special because you are the extension of me.”

“Man represents my image, woman - my emotions. Together, you represent the totality of God. So man, treat woman well. Love her, respect her, for she is fragile. In hurting her, you hurt me. What you do to her, you do to me. In crushing her, you only damage your own heart, the heart of your Father and the heart of her Father. Woman, support man. In humility, show him the power of emotion I have given you. In gentle quietness show your strength. In love, show him that you are the rib that protects his inner self.”

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From Deb's [found this in facebook...] entry on 16/01/2008 (Sunday):

GIRL~

When a GIRL is quiet…millions of things are running in her mind. When a GIRL is not arguing…she is thinking deeply. When a GIRL looks at u with eyes full of questions…she is wondering how long you will be around. When a GIRL answers "I'm fine" after a few seconds…she is not at all fine. When a GIRL stares at you…she is wondering why you are lying. When a GIRL lays on your chest…she is wishing for you to be hers forever. When a GIRL wants to see you everyday…she wants to be pampered. When a GIRL says "I love you"…she means it. When a GIRL says "I miss you"…no one in this world can miss you more than that.

Life only comes around once make sure u spend it with the right person. Find a guy…who calls you beautiful instead of hot…who calls you back when you hang up on him…who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who…kisses your forehead. Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats…who holds your hand in front of his friends…who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you…who turns to his friends and says, "That's her!"

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From Shin's [Fwd: Subject: The One Flaw in Women‏] email on 04/05/2005 (Wednesday):

The One Flaw in Women~

By the time the Lord made woman, He had been working six days straight. He was very tired. An angel appeared before Him and said, "Lord, why are you spending so much time on this one?" The Lord answered, "Have you seen the spec sheet on her? She has to be water-proof, but not plastic or hard. She must have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and be able to run on diet Coke and leftovers. She must have a lap that can hold at least four children at a time, a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart, and she must be able to talk on the telephone, cook, scold a child and pet the dog all at the same time with only two hands." The angel was astounded. "No way! Only two hands!" "Yes,the Lord said. "And that's just the standard model." "Lord, that is too much work for you. Wait until tomorrow. You can finish up then."

The Lord protested."I am too close to finishing this creation that is so close to my heart. She can already heal herself and work 18 hours a day. I'm just about done." The angel moved in for a closer look and touched the woman. "Lord, you've made her so soft." "Yes, she is soft." the Lord agreed. "But she is also tough! You have no idea what she can do, endure, or accomplish." "Will she be able to think, too?" The angel asked. The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think; she will be able to pray, reason, meditate and negotiate." The angel noticed something and reached out to touch the woman's cheek. "Oops! You've put so much in her, she is starting to leak, Lord. I told you, you were putting too much in this one." "That's not a leak, that's a tear." "What's that for?" the angel inquired. The Lord whispered, "Her tears are the way she will express her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride. It is a symbol of her heart." The angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You've thought of everything. This woman you are making is truly amazing, is she not?"

With all the pride of a brand-new father, the Lord said, "Oh yes she is! Women have strengths that will amaze men." "They bear hardships and carry burdens, but they will, at the same time, hold happiness, love and joy. They will smile when they want to scream. Sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for those they love and all that they believe in. They stand up for injustice and remain seated in humility. They will not take no for an answer when they know there is a better way. They will go without so that their family, particularly the children can have what they need. They will go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They will go to court with a wayward husband. They love unconditionally often, asking for and taking little in return. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends are rewarded. They are happy to hear about a birth, knowing the difficulties that may lie ahead. They cheer because they will help a friend through it all. They love weddings and might even help make the dress. They can cook and some can even bake. Their hearts break when someone dies yet, they are strong when others may think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart and, they will offer them to anyone who needs one. They come in all sizes, shapes and colors. They can walk, run, fly, drive or e-mail to remind you that they love you. It is the heart of a woman that will keep the world turning and things in order. They have the babies because men could never figure out how to put so much in such a small space. Women bring hope and joy. They bring compassion and ideals. They are the moral support that keeps the family of humanity together.

Women have important things to say and even more important things to do. They ask very little and offer all they have & that's their one flaw. "What flaw?" asked the angel. Sadly, the Lord responded, "They seem to always forget their worth."

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女孩子的内心世界。。。是又丰富又复杂的~

*grin*

To all women & women-to-be:
Happy International Women's Day~!!!


Song of the Day: This One's For The Girls - Martina McBride
```This one's for the girls…
```Who've ever had a broken heart…
```Who've wished upon a shooting star…
```You're beautiful the way you are…
```This one's for the girls…
```Who love without holding back…
```Who dream with everything they have…
```All around the world…
```This one's for the girls```

Quote of the Day: Woman was taken out of man; not out of his head to top him, nor out of his feet to be trampled underfoot; but out of his side to be equal to him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be loved. -Matthew Henry

Nice Guys: The Endangered Species~

Wong Fu Productions presents: [Just a Nice Guy]~

[Just a Nice Guy] Part 1~

>>Part 1<<


[Just a Nice Guy] Part 2~

>>Part 2<<

[Just a Nice Guy] Part 3~

>>Part 3<<

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This is to all the attached nice guys:

To every guy who said, "sex can wait".
To every guy who said, "you are beautiful".
To every guy who was never too busy to drive across town to see her.
To every guy who gave her flowers and a card when she was sick.
To every guy who had given her flowers just because he wanted to.
To every guy who said he would die for her.
To every guy who really would.
To every guy who did what she wanted to do.
To every guy who cried in front of her.
To every guy whom she cried in front of.
To every guy who holds hands with her.
To every guy who kisses her with meaning.
To every guy who hugs her when she's sad.
To every guy who hugs her for no reason at all.
To every guy who would give his jacket up for her.
To every guy who calls to make sure she got home safe.
To every guy who would sit and wait for her for hours just to be able to see her for ten minutes.
To every guy who would give his seat up for her.
To every guy who just wants to cuddle with her.
To every guy who reassures her that she is beautiful no matter what.
To every guy who tells his secrets to her.
To every guy who tries to show how much he cared through every word and every breath.
To every guy who thought maybe this could be the one.
To every guy who believed in her dreams.
To every guy who would have done anything so she could achieve them.
To every guy who never laughed at her when she told him her dreams.
To every guy who would regret hurting her.
To every guy who walked her to her door.
To every guy who wasn't just trying to get laid.
To every guy who actually listens.
To every guy who gave her his heart.
To every guy who would pray that she is happy even if she is no longer with him.

-unknown

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This is to all the unattached nice guys:

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

>>Ode to the Nice Guys<<
Fu-zu Jen - SEAS/WH (2003)

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And someday…I hope you will find her too~

Do You Not Understand Women~???

(This entry was shifted from 31/04/2006 Sunday to 07/05/2006 Sunday due to a slight miscalculation of the number of my blog entries…content unchanged~)

To celebrate my 100th blog entry anniversary…thinx I'll display my newly compiled set of works~ Once again…I'm only the compiler…& all the authors are unknown…haha & this post is solely for entertainment & enlightenment purposes k~!!!

The Problem With Women~

If you TREAT her nicely, she says you are IN LOVE with her;
If you Don't, she says u are DAO.

If you DRESS nicely, she says you are trying to act SHUAI;
If you Don't, she says you are UGLY.

If you ARGUE with her, she says you are STUBBORN;
If you keep QUIET, she says you have no BRAINS.

If you are SMARTER than her, she will force you to let her WIN;
If she's Smarter than you, she will HAOLIAN.

If you don't LOVE her, she tries to POSSESS u;
If you LOVE her, she will try to LEAVE you.

If you don't KISS her, she says you don't Love her;
If you KISS her, she will try to avoid.

If you tell her your PROBLEM, she says you are TROUBLESOME;
If you don't, she says that you don't TRUST her.

If you SCOLD her, you are like a FATHER to her;
If she SCOLDS you, it is because she CARES for you.

If you BREAK your PROMISE, u cannot be TRUSTED;
If she BREAKS hers, she is FORCED to do so.

If you SMOKE, you are a BAD BOY;
If she SMOKES, she is a GENTLELADY.

If you do WELL in your exams, she says it's LUCK;
If she does WELL, it's BRAINS.

If you HURT her, you are CRUEL;
If she HURTS you, you are too SENSITIVE.


Words Women Use~

FINE~
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks as this will cause you to have one of those arguments.

FIVE MINUTES~
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.

NOTHING~
This means "something", and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".

GO AHEAD~ (With Raised Eyebrows)
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".

GO AHEAD~ (Normal Eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

LOUD SIGH~
This is not actually a word, but a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why is she wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".

SOFT SIGH~
Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. "Soft Sigh" means that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.

OH~
This word followed by any statement is trouble. If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine"when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. "Oh" as the lead-in to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows and a "Go ahead".

THAT'S OKAY~
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow".

PLEASE DO~
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay."

THANKS~
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you're welcome.

THANKS A LOT~
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh". Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh", as she will only tell you "Nothing."


Why Women Cry~

A little boy asked his mother, "Why are you crying?"

"Because I'm a woman," she told him.

"I don't understand," he said.

His Mom just hugged him and said, "And you never will."

Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?"

"All women cry for no reason," was all his dad could say.

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry. Finally he put in a call to God. When God got on the phone, he asked, "God, why do women cry so easily?"

God replied:
"When I made the woman, she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort.

I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children.

I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.

I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly.

I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.

And finally, I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed."
"You see my son," said God, "the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides."


Song of the Day: Natural Woman - Kelly Clarkson (AI: 23/07/2002)

Quote of the Day: God created man before creating woman, because you need a rough draft before creating a masterpiece. -unknown

The Featured F Word~

Just another post for mass-entertainment purposes…~ *hmm*
& mass-amusement & mass-enlightenment purposes…haha~!!!

*faint*

Featured Topic of Post:

The Most Versatile Word In The English Language…~

A.k.a. The ‘F’ Word~

Supposed Origin Of THE Word~ (read this from an email in Sec 1)

In ancient England a person could not have sex unless you had consent of the King (unless you were in the Royal Family). When anyone wanted to have a baby, they got consent of the King. The King gave them a placard that they hung on their door while they were having sex. The placard had F. U. C. K. (Fornication Under Consent of the King) on it. Now you know where that came from.

*faint*

New Interpretation Of THE Word~ (read this from an sms last year)

Remember when u need a FUCK
I will always be there for u
Because FUCK stands for ‘Friendship U Can Keep’

Haha really can *faint* lar~

Treat of the Day: The Most Versatile Word In The English Language
Watched this in Sec 1…entertaining & amusing & enlightening~ *faint*

Quote of the Day: FUCK is an international word. It doesn't matter where you are in the world, everyone knows exactly what you mean when you say, "Fuck Off". -unknown

F is for…*faint*

Males Versus Females~

Oh well…this post is for mass-ENTERTAINMENT purposes only…& I didn’t come up with any of them k…just complied them for fun haha~

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Men versus Women~

What do Women Want~???

When I was a young woman, all I wanted was a guy with big muscles. So I dated a muscular guy. He was as strong as Terminator, but he beat up any other guy who would stare at me. I was afraid he would hit me too. So I dumped him when he was in jail.

Then I decided to date a romantic guy. He was so sweet: he sent me flowers every Friday to my office just to ask me out; one time he packed himself into a box as my birthday gift. But he was also romantic to other girls until I found out from a florist that he ordered 5 dozens roses each Friday. It was too late, he already dumped me.

So I decided to date a stable guy. He was a "good" man and he had a Ph.D from MIT. But all he talked with me was M/M/1 Queuing theory. I had to dump him because when one day I said I was going to Australia, he said "you don't need to go there to buy apples. There's a mama shop across the street."

After that I decided to date an interesting guy. He was so funny and he was like "George" in TV Steinfield. He made me laugh all the time. But later, I couldn't laugh any more. He didn't have a job, nor did he plan to find one. All he did was playing Mahjong and "Cho Dai Di."The worst thing is that we got married.

What do Men Want?

When I was in poly, all I wanted was a girl with big boobs. So I dated a girl with big boobs, but there was no passion.

So I decided I needed a passionate girl. In University, I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency, she cried all the time. So I decided I needed a girl with some stability and I found a very stable girl. But she was so boring, she never got excited about anything.

So I decided I needed a girl with some excitement. There, I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She was direction-less.

So I decided to find a girl with some ambition. After graduation, I found an ambitious girl and married her. She was so ambitious, she divorced me and took everything I owned.

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男人 versus 女人~

男人必备的条件~

首先你要帅。 　　
你要是不帅，那你要有钱。 　　
你要是没钱，那你要高。 　　
你要是不高，那你得要会说话。 　　
你要是不太会说话，那你要幽默。 　　
你要是不幽默，那你起码也要懂幽默。 　　
如果你连幽默都不懂，那你就得体贴一点。 　　
你要是不会体贴，那温柔一点总会吧！ 　
如果你就是温柔不起来，那你就要酷一点。 　　
要是连耍酷都不会，那你就装老实一点。
要是你看起来就不老实，那就…靠“运气”吧！

女人必备的条件~

首先你要漂亮。 　　
你要是不漂亮，那么你要有气质。 　　
你要是没气质，那么你要温柔。 　　
你要是不温柔，那么你得善解人意。 　　
你要是不太善解人意，但你要长的还可以。 　　
你要是长的有点抱歉的话，那么你起码也要会打扮。 　　
如果你连打扮都不懂，那么就得贤慧一点。 　　
你要是不会做家务事，那跟你妈学着点儿。 　　
如果你连学都懒得学，那么你就要拉下脸来“倒追”男人。
要是连“倒追”都不 会，那你最好家里要有钱。
要是你连钱都没有，那就…靠“缘分”吧！ 　

文章出处：大河报

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Boys versus Girls~

Boys~

A Heart is not a plaything,
a heart is not a toy,
but if you want it broken,
just give it to a boy.

Boys like to play with things,
to see what makes them run,
but when it comes to kissing,
they do it just for fun.

Boys don't give their hearts away
they play us girls like fools
wait until we give our hearts away
and then they play it cool.

You'll wonder where he is at night,
you'll wonder if he's true,
one moment you'll be happy,
the next you'll be blue.

When you get a chance to see him,
your heart begins to dance,
your life revolves around him,
there's nothing like romance.

When it starts to happen,
you'll worry day and night,
you see my friend you’re losing him,
it never turns out right.

Boys are great, though immature,
the price you pay is high,
he may seem sweet and gorgeous,
but remember he's a guy.

Don't fall in love with just a boy,
that takes a lot of nerve,
what you need is a man,
to get what you deserve.

So when you think it’s happening,
be careful if you can,
before you give your heart away,
make sure that he's a man!

Girls~

There are many good things in life,
like cars, money, and weed.
But if you want something confusing,
a girl is all you need.

A girl doesn't say what she wants,
but you're somehow supposed to know.
If they want to do this or do that,
stay here, stay there, or just go.

Then there's the time, you all know what I mean,
that monthly little joy.
That lets them abuse the s*** out of you,
just for being a boy.

If you ever dare look at another girl,
they seem to scream, go on, and panic.
But watch how fast they ignore you,
at the sight of that queer from Titanic.

They give you questions like "Am I fat?"
and "If you could go with one of my friends, who?".
There is no answer, face the facts,
you are definitely through.

They take nothing and blow it up,
and make a tremendous fuss.
So girls, no matter what you think,
you are just as hard to understand as us.

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All authors…unknown~


Treat of the Day: Stereotypes
Thanxs to AM for introducing this video to me~ *lol*

Song of the Day: Feel The Fire - Masterboy